Important: Before you study this lesson please watch this video, “Why?“. Example: If you or your client are in a relationship and the other person displayed an attitude of not being “Truthful”, you’ll need to master, and you’ll need to educate your client the following: “Confront and Level!”, “Assertive Communications!”, as well as “I Feel Good, PST!”.
Make sure to answer the questions at the end and follow the instructions for submission!
If you don’t learn how to forgive others then don’t expect a life of healthy relationships!
We all deal with unfairness, disappointments, broken expectations, and injustice at some point in our lives. An unkept promise, an unfaithful partner, an abusive parent, missed promotion at work due to someone else’s fault or a backstabbing friend; we all have experienced unfairness in one way or the other.
When events like these take place, some people dust themselves off and move on with their lives. They don’t sweat stuff. But for some people, moving on from the brutality of injustice isn’t easy. For them, even the thought of one unfortunate incident cuts deep and brings back all the painful memories associated with it that ultimately give rise to a deteriorated emotional state.
When injustice takes place, we at least expect an apology from the person. We feel the need for the other person to analyze his actions, realize his mistakes, make amendments to his behavior, or rectify the situation. But that doesn’t always happen. Does it? How others behave is not something we can control.
When we come across injustice, we feel stripped from our rights and power. A wrongful act by someone also affects our self-esteem and results in an immense amount of anger and resentment. But anger is not all bad. When we experience anger, it can lead to positive outcomes as well. Anger can be a strong motivator to bring change and can enable us to make major life shifts. But the problems arise when we keep the anger bottled up inside and we continue brimming with resentment.
Most people choose to live with anger and resentment because they don’t want to forgive. The unfortunate incident becomes bigger than anything and influences their feelings. They get so immersed in the thoughts and the memories of the incident that it starts shaping their lives. When emotions like anger and resentment are not managed constructively, it will lead a person to seek vengeance, eventually resulting in verbal violence and physical assault.
Sounds exhausting, doesn’t it?
Why can’t we move on? Why is forgiving others so difficult?
The primary reason why some people run away from the option of forgiving those who have wronged them is because they misunderstand forgiveness. They believe that if they’ll forgive someone, they’ll have to go back to having a relationship with them. They’ll have to pretend that things are normal again and they’ll have to put up with the hurt.
But what if we told you forgiveness is not what you think it is?
Forgiving doesn’t mean agreeing with someone and accepting his/her wrongful actions. It doesn’t mean that the relationship will get restored overnight, and it certainly doesn’t mean that you have to forget about the event and start with a clean slate and pretend like nothing ever happened.
Forgiveness is acknowledging the unfair acts, taking out time to grieve, making peace with it to find a resolution, and moving on. When we forgive someone, we get liberated from all the pain, anger, and resentment. Forgiving someone can help us heel and it can help us become free from all the hurt we carry inside.
How to forgive someone
Below are some steps that can help you in letting go of the anger and forgive someone who has wronged you. But it won’t happen overnight. It will require some time to make peace with the painful situation, but you’ll heal. With regular practice and little patience, you’ll be able to move on and be free.
Stop overthinking: Sometimes, when unfortunate events take place, our imagination not only intensifies the situation but also amps up our anger and resentment. Our imagination adds up to the events, their consequences, and makes them much bigger than they really are. While dealing with negative thoughts and painful memories, in order to remedy the situation, it’s important to see things as they are.
Meditate: Meditation not only helps in relieving stress but also helps in increasing self-awareness. It lessens the anxiety, helps you generate compassion, empathy, and kindness and also promotes better mental health. Taking out ten to twenty minutes to meditate can help you find peace.
Take time to grieve: When we finally stop resisting, grieving helps us accept the situation and also allows us to feel emotions connected with the incident. It makes the process of making peace with the event easier and helps us move on. But the duration of grieving can be different for every individual as everyone moves at their own pace. Don’t rush this process. Take all the time you need to heal. Talking to a trusted friend or a family member can help you let it all out and can also provide you with some fresh perspective. If you are not someone who likes sharing personal experiences, then writing things down in a diary can help you express your thoughts and anger better.
Restore your boundaries: Another crucial step is to restore your boundaries. Sometimes, we experience anger because we feel powerless in a situation. Sometimes, it’s because we fail to assert ourselves. Knowing what is acceptable with you and what is not can help you avoid and tackle such incidents in the future.
No one is perfect: Everyone makes mistakes. After all we all are humans. We are not telling you to find justification behind someone’s wrongful actions, but to acknowledge the fact that no one is perfect.
Focus on the bigger picture: Dealing with hurt, anger, and resentment can be challenging. You might find yourself moving one step ahead and taking two steps back. But that’s okay. As long as you are making improvements, as long as things are working out for you and you are making even a little progress, it’s okay. You don’t have to beat yourself up. Just keep reminding yourself of the bigger picture. Keep reminding yourself of the purpose. Why did you start in the first place, why do you want to forgive?
So how has forgiving someone changed your life? What steps did you take to forgive someone who had wronged you?
Please write an essay, up to two pages, about a past experience you or someone you know forgave someone after a hurtful event. Tell us in detail, who, what, when, where, why, to whom, the time, the place of what you did. The outcome! And tell us in detail how you could have changed that use from what you learned today so the outcome would have been good. Internalize this lesson. Make it become a part of you. Share your story in the “Blog Section”
Our advice is for you to practice “Not Hurting Anyone and Forgiving Others” for at least a week. Tell others around you to point out any event in which you didn’t. Have them hold you accountable. Visit the “Forum” and do a “CONFESSION”.
What is a “CONFESSION”? A CONFESSION IS WHEN YOU’VE DISPLAYED A WRONG BEHAVIOR AND WERE HELD ACCOUNTABLE BY ONE OF YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS, PEERS, OR EVEN BY YOU. VISIT THE “FORUM” AND TELL US ABOUT IT. WE WILL GIVE YOU FEEDBACK! MAKE SURE TO WATCH THE VIDEO ABOUT “CONFESSION” FOR MORE DETAILS! FURTHERMORE, BECOME A MEMBER OF THE FORUM AND GIVE FEEDBACK TO OTHERS. “That’s how you gain practice in becoming a CERTIFIED LIFE COACH!
Read the article? Time to introspect!
Q1. How do you feel when you come across injustice? How does it affect you?
Q2. Do you seek revenge when you experience an unfair event? Why?
Q3. Are you holding anger inside? Do you resent people? Why do you think you can’t let it go? What’s stopping you?
Q4. What steps do you think one should take to forgive someone?
Q5. Do you take time to grieve when something bad happens to you? How do you move on from it?
This module includes the following:
- Why Become a Life Coach
- The Difference Between Healthy and Unhealthy Relationships
- Healthy Relationships
- Respect in a Relationship
- What is Love
- Bad Relationships
- Neglecting Others
- Being Selfish
- Low Self Esteem
- The Dominator
- The Bully
- Manipulating Others
- I am Better Than You
- Abandoned as a Child
- Abandoned by My Children
- Forgiving Others
- Letting Go of Resentment
- Attitude Check & Confession
- Confront and Level
- I Feel Good, PST™
There is no way any relationship will survive without having the qualities mentioned above.
Make sure to read each article carefully at least three time. Print your workbook (will be available per lesson.) Answer all questions and enter them in your workbook. Once you have completed this entire journey, you will be issued a Life Coach Certificate so long as you’ve been a member of the “Forums.”
Also, follow the instruction for sharing your story in our Forums as well as participating in our “Forums,” especially our unique “Confessions Forum” so you may gain practice, knowledge, experience, and expertise!
I am thankful that you have given me this opportunity to share all of this with you. May God bless you and bring prosperity and peace into your life.
George Tannous, PhD
This is Where Confessions, Attitude Checks, Accountability, Give and Receive Feedback Comes in. Practice for Your Own Practice!
Well, you might be asking yourself “How am I going to get practice for my practice?” Great question and I thought you’ll never ask!
#1 You are part of a group with the same interests.
#2 You have a question in regards to one of your clients and we are here to help you.
#3 Others have questions and you can give feedback and help them.
#4 You need to do a confession.
#5 And much more.
You Are Never Alone! Join the Forums!
Once you have completed this entire journey, you will be issued a Life Coach Certificate. Must participate in our Forums to get certified! You’ll achieve your internship by joining and partcipating in our “Forums”.